Blog-ahol

Remember 2 months ago, when sports radio started a silly rumor about bringing Chris Bosh to Utah? Or Facebook groups clamoring to put a Jazz uni on the big man? How stupid were those? I understand fans trying to be optimistic, but did anyone have real hopes to bringing Chris Bosh to the Jazz? Foolish, idiotic really... We should focus our efforts on players that MIGHT ACTUALLY come to Utah. Of course I'm talking about LeBron James!

Lebron, before you have your one hour Bachelor special to announce your new team. I really think you should hear what the state of Utah and the Jazz have to offer big name free agents like you.

1) The Best PG in the League...maybe

Two words: D-Will.... He's the best point guard in the LEAGUE! Better than Paul, Rondo, Rose combined. At least to most Utah fans, this is what we think. There's not even a competition, Chris Paul is not even in the same league as Deron Williams. Chris Paul isn't as healthy as Deron, in head to head match-ups Deron dominates Paul. Paul has flaws, and Deron Williams is perfect. Lebron...you'd be stupid not to want to play with the second best PG in the history of the NBA. (Aside from Stockton of course)

2) The Best Coach in the NBA....to have never won anything.

C'mon Lebron. Don't you want to play with zero time champion, zero time coach of the year Jerry Sloan? That's not a knock on Coach Sloan. Lebron will definitely like to play for a coach that'll bust his balls every practice. That won't play favorites to a star. Lebron needs that control in his life. Lebron is running way too wild in his game, and needs to run the "high C" to become a better NBA player.

3) Utah Nightlife & Weather

This is one of the biggest attractions about Utah? The Night Life. Seriously, who wants to go South Beach? Listen Lebron, nothing good happens past midnight. That won't be a problem. Last call is at 1 o'clock in Utah. You'll be home in bed by 2 AM! Look Lebron, a good night's rest is essential for your athletic ability. And c'mon...you're 25 years old. You're an OLDIE! Time to go home, settle down, and play a game of monopoly with the kids. You're young party animal days are truly behind you.

Have you heard of the best snow on earth? Yeah, that's here in Utah. Cleveland and Toronto get cold....so does Utah!!! Makes it a PRIME destination for NBA players. Who cares about LA and Miami? Am I right?

4) You want a Big Market?

Lebron...down by my house alone? In the small city of Clinton, we have a Wal Mart AND a Winco.... trust me, grocery shopping will not be a problem.

As you see Lebron; The Utah Jazz is a prime market for Free Agents. And I'd be shocked if you didn't sign with the Jazz in 20-Lebron. Especially since we'll be getting Andrei Kirilenko's contract off in 2011, Carmelo will be coming too.